Love Yourself

Why do you feel like you’re not enough?

Lets crack that code:

Our inner critic controls everything by trying to please everyone, making sure everything is perfect which leads you to feeling stressed out.  Procrastinating about your desires will make you miserable and to distract yourself and feel safe you please others in the mean time which leaves you feeling empty.  You need to balance your goals with helping others.

For example you’re marriage or relationship is half exciting because no one respects the others choices so one reluctantly gives in to move along or your goals become a someday wish list or a forgotten idea but it’s not long before something reminds you of your desires and then  you go right back to into feeling like you’re not enough. Comes back to balance. Pay attention to what you want and make it happen.

Tip:  when you’re in a good mental state, I want you to write 5 fabulous things you Love about yourself and 5 Goals to achieve by the end of this month.  Put that List into a frame and hang it on the wall with a picture of yourself alone or with other important people.  Put it up in your closet, your washroom, on your deck....somewhere to remind yourself how your desires are important and find ways to get them accomplished. Celebrate your life while you are here and can.

You could do this for your kids, siblings or whoever as a gift...write 5 things you love about them with your favorite picture of them or both of you!  How loving is that?

FEEL GOOD because You Deserve It!  Give yourself permission to believe that you can be, do or create anything you want because you have that choice.

When you live up to your expectations this creates a mindset of courage. When you have courage your inner critic turns into self empowerment. Strive for excellence instead of perfection. Go out and set boundaries about helping others before helping yourself and get a support system instead of isolating. Share what you have learned with new and old friends and feel amazing like you should because you are enough!

7 Day Refresh Your Marriage Challenge




Take a 7 day challenge!  Make this week the turning point.

IF you start now in just a few short days, your relationship will be in a different place!

Have you taken a challenge before?                          

Challenges push you out of your comfort zone and gets you excited and interactive.

If the two of you want to make your Marriage Super Sexy and Rock your Communication, this challenge is for you! 

What does a 7 day commitment give you? 

Your sense of achievement and new playful  intimate options

Closeness and reconnection

Fun dates nights at home, in your city  or beyond

Refreshing your mindset towards each other which helps to harmonize your entire family

To Start considering a7 day challenge, use Affirmations that empower you such as: 

“I am in the process of making our life amazing” 
“by taking this challenge with my partner I am making the commitment to self improvement” 
"we will embrace every challenge with excitement" 
 
JUST DO IT
Still not sure if a 7 day Challenge is right for you?

LET’S GO

If we examine your inner thoughts and feelings there is an area of your life that is currently being challenged by your feelings of dissatisfaction, rejection or boredom and you and your partner are seeking a change.

HAVE FUN
  
Many anniversaries go by in a marriage or relationship and sometimes not much is done or said on that day or throughout the year.  If that's your situation and you would like to spritz it up with some fun date nights and more meaningful communication I invite you to take this challenge.

Find out more at ShanonDawn.com













  

Money Thoughts


Money Thoughts

Believe it or not the subject of money as you grew up has had a lasting effect.  
Are you aware of this?

Did you hear the following words in a negative connotation;  bill payments, can’t afford this or that; we’re not made of money?  Or could it have been that you grew up with parents that had success and they were snobby about it which made you feel uncomfortable?  Was one parent a spender and another a saver?  Were there arguments about money? All of these topics made an imprint for you which is good to keep in mind if you have children, watch how your energy of the money topic is discussed around them.

So how are you spending your money now a days? Do you spend as much as you can each week because you feel free to do so?  Do you want to look better than your colleagues or are you spending money because you’re bored so you go shopping, get manicures and dine out with friends to cure those moments?  Or have you purchase a new car instead of a used one which would make sense financially?

 

Does any of this resonate?

At some point we all wake up and dread checking our banking statements.  Thoughts similar to; how much is on my credit card and how much is in my savings and when is my next pay coming in makes us uptight right?  What about investments? Have you started for your retirement?

If you feel uncomfortable the solution is to face your current money situation and ask your bank questions to educate yourself of the choices available for you. Don't wait for your husband or someone else to take care of it you should learn it for yourself so you can happily pay off your debts and start saving.  The sooner you start to delegate your money in the right direction the better.

Tricks to help you save money;  I have heard to keep yourself from impulsive purchases you should leave credit cards at home frozen in a chunk of ice or cut them up.  Another great tool is to ask the bank to lower your interest rate and lower the limit of your card.

Don’t be fooled by super rich people either.  They are usually in debt with all of their extra cars and homes on lines of credit and if you compare yourself and try to keep up with their illusion, you are building debt for  your ego.

If we look at the psychology of your thoughts realize that what you focus on expands. What do I mean? I mean if you feel like spending you will go out and have a blast with or without guilt. If you focus on saving you will refrain, find the deals and keep to a budget.  Did you notice I used the word “feel” when it comes to spending?  That’s because most of us buy with emotions.  When you feel bored, insecure in your status of looks or otherwise you are likely to make a purchase to feel better.  That’s why commercials create pretty scenery for shavers as an example because they want you to think it’s amazing to shave with their product.  How funny is that?  If we examine commercials for men they build desire for expensive cars.  Which leads me to point out the fact that society gears high end products for men because they generally make more money?  Why do they make more money?  They ask for it!  It is well known that women tend to undervalue their worth in business.  

Are you frustrated yet? 

Good, you should be.  Start to take responsibility for your finances so you have more for you and your family. Start to ask for a raise when you go into a review with your company by pointing out all of your strengths and productivity that has enhanced the company.  If you work for yourself, start to charge your clients more. Get extra education to take your business to the next level. Book an appointment today with a financial advisor or bank clerk to take back your money power.  Plan for success on your terms.

Start to feel positive by ‘accepting yourself for who you are right now’ because You’re Worth It!

Get Inspired

Do you need to get inspired?  I will help you!

Do you realize while you’re working on your business at home or elsewhere listening to musicians on satellite radio effortlessly, you are listening to several months of commitment?  

Think about this; these bands have put their words to paper after an idea and have inserted music notes to jive.  They would have had to play around with the notes and the words for hours. They might also have to converse with producers, band members and marketing agents who they took the time to find so they could create their dreams so that you and I could enjoy their efforts. 

Their music actually helps us to create our best selves.   

Your body becomes fit, your heart feels emotion, and your work becomes fun. The atmosphere in your car, your romantic getaways and all holiday seasons of your life can be said to have been inspired by music and not to mention your kids singing in a play that makes you smile.

There is no limit to what music can do for you and that is why you should come back to appreciate how those artists took the time and the consistent effort that you are doing in your business to make things come alive.

You are no different!  When you feel stuck and alone in your business have a quick thought about all of those awesome bands you enjoy, who are pushing themselves right at this very minute to be creative and come up with their next 25 songs.

I hope this helps you to reconnect with your core, to stay on track with your desires, to know that your hard work will be enjoyed by others for years to come.  There is no reason to be stuck for long.          

I am a 70's fan with a twist of the latest dance song which gets me singing and dancing!      

The world awaits your new business! Let us know who you are and what songs inspire you in the comments below.

From Life Coach Shanon Dawn

Follow me on twitter/instagram / periscope  @shanondawns 

Components of a Healthy Relationship

What are the Components of a Healthy Relationship?

For all relationships and marriages over 10 years old and have overcome challenges, I salute you!

By now you know that all couples go through ebbs and flow with their emotions, actions and conversations.  Some couples manage well while others fall apart.  

The intention behind getting together with someone is to remain flexible and respectful at all times.
Obviously there are plenty of examples of couples who did not practice this and divorced.  Don't be the next statistic.

Here are some reasons why couples do not make it

1. Communication breakdown = having topics repeatedly discussed without results which leads to feeling shut down and hopeless.  

2. Routine with intimacy =  spontaneity is gone and a reminder is needed to keep sex and intimacy fresh, flirty and fun....this is your reminder.

3. Finances = many couples hide behind concealed purchases, withholding investment information.

4. Children = are never on the same page pertaining to discipline

5. Time = lack quality time together. 

6. Friends = socializing with friends that are encouraging the breakdown of your spouses flaws.

7. Expectations = Unmet expectations are a major source of conflict in marriages. 


It’s time to open up and discuss the limits and limitless sides to your relationship. 

 1. If you and your spouse are in a spot where having conversations escalates into arguments, find a third person to be with during those times like a coach, therapist, banker, trusted friend or family. 
What about an email as an ice breaker?  Send an email to start the conversation and after two or three between you and your spouse start the conversation.

2. Fresh Flirty and Fun sex that is spontaneous can be a possible all you have to do is be the one to start it.  Roll play, dress different, wear perfume, nibble your partners ear, make suggestions at inappropriate times just to get the atmosphere to change. 
Intentions need to be met with a push. If you sit and wish you will get nowhere.

3. What about your money?  Do you live paycheque to paycheque, off lines of credit?  Who is the saver and who is the spender?  Can you sit together at home or in a bank and discuss?  The sooner you both reach agreements the better.

4.  Children are the love of your life but can change your relationship dynamics drastically.  If you are finding that you are trying to feed your child healthy and your spouse feeds what ever they can, create a preferred menu, purchase those foods, prep them ahead of time and put them into sealed containers in your fridge.  Or, create a go to list and post it. 

5. Quality time can mean keeping each other up to date with future goals, ask your partner what the next year looks like for them what hobbies will they want to take up and what they would like to see for your marriage and as a family?  What else is exciting in their career?  Find ways to communicate to listen and share your desires as well. If you do this on a regular basis you will be well on your way to feeling cohesive.

6. Any friends that seem negative or derogatory more often than positive, you may have to rethink your situation with them. If they have no luck in their relationships or thinking how can they support you as a friend? The test is do you feel good or motivated after being with them or do you feel like you have to rescue them and their situations all of the time?  I would encourage you to get out and find new friends who pursue goals and love life. They say we are who we hang out with.

7. Expectations will be met with resistance if they are not cured with acknowledgement from the first time you discuss it.  There has to be an agreement made verbally or in another form of validation like an email to achieve the relationship goals you have.

Book a date to have these conversations, be flirty with one another and become the person you want to see in your relationship who is happy with results because you made sure the two of you took the time to create something worth loving for.

 .

Here is your 3 day challenge:

 Write love notes with appreciation

Say nothing negative

Make Love

Spend 30 minutes to 1 hour talking without electronics or interruptions

Post something loving on social media about your partner or family

Create a date for the following week

When you are willing to change your behaviour your partner will mimic the love back.

Start your day now and have fun creating this slightly new version.

Find me on Skype @ Shanon.Dawn  and follow my blog @ shanondawngoaldigger.blogspot.com

Periscope and twitter @shanondawns

Create Love and Lust in your Marriage

As a relationship coach I want you to notice the love and lust between a man and woman when they look at each other.  These two are amongst hundreds of people because Justin Trudeau just won the vote of becoming Canada's next Prime Minister.

For couples in long term relationships, it is so important to show each other love no matter where they are in life on the planet.  Pure commitment does not have to be work it can be natural and fun, the key is to not loose that connection. For more in depth reading look at my next blog post What are the Components of a Healthy Relationship?

Love is to have closeness and security.  Lust is to desire your partner while they're in their element of confidence. The balance for longevity comes from building and rebuilding the love and lust between the two of you.  When you show your partner you are vulnerable with them exclusively even in your proudest moment around hundreds of people and camera's you break all the rules and all the barriers of feeling like you can only be romantic when it's appropriate. Let your romance blossom where is it wants and you will hold the key to keeping your love life exciting and your partner wanting more of you.

Many people search for the loophole of wanting out of their relationships by having an affair or finding reasons to shut down their marriage because they compare,  thinking everyone else's relationship looks better.  The key to a fabulous deep and meaningful relationship is to create and recreate the intentions of keeping your partnership interesting, fun and flirty.

Here are the top 5 ways to keep your relationship hot:

1.  Commit to creating a passionate marriage with deliberate eye contact and kisses anywhere
2.  Go somewhere fun together once a month without the kids or friends and be flirty
3.  During the week of normality speak with meaning and permanence for the future
4.  Dress up, keep your look fresh, wear different clothes, stay respectful, say sorry if necessary
5.  Grow together not apart, be supportive, create weekly surprises to look forward to and most of all be the person that reacts purposefully from the heart.

You both can have accolades and attention from the entire world to enjoy but just remember to make your partner feel appreciated in that special way that only you two can understand.

*picture courtesy of www.express.co.uk

Stay at Home Mom to Online Mompreneur Strategies

There comes a moment in a woman's life where she will ponder her options and come up with questions like: 

I would like to start my own business now that the kids are older but I have no idea where to start!

Lets look at what is possible?
As a woman who dreams about her possibilities realizes that she has the potential to achieve anything she wants. By now you are a great multitasker at being the wife, the lover, the housekeeper, the mom, the business management team paying bills....and now you wish to start your own business. Congratulations!

To start your journey all you need is to set aside 30 minutes or two 15 minute moments each day throughout your week to progress with the necessary research and implementation. If you can do 60 minutes or more, go for it. If you fail to follow through some days do not be hard on yourself just get back into focus as soon as you can and a great way to maintain this level of commitment is to ask a friend or family member to hold you accountable. Become accountability partners by reciprocating.

One of the biggest hurtles is convincing yourself to "start" and to take "consistent" action. 
Lets break down how to overcome the fear of starting and the fear of consistentency because this is the number one reason why women stop trying.

By gaining an accountability partner they will support you through your changes.

Right now would be a good time to write what you might be afraid to do next like;
making the commitment to this change in your life, to make the calls that are necessary to help you find out more, to deal with an increase of demands in your time and energy which may mean less time for family, being afraid to invest money for your education upgrade or to pay a mentor, afraid to make money because it feels strange, no support from your spouse because they are busy, feeling alone and not knowing where to start.

I'm here to tell you that you can take baby steps where it takes you a few years to implement your business or giant steps where you get yourself educated and running a business in 2 years or less.  It's up to you, my point is just start from where you are find a way to fill in the gaps and create your vision.

Take a deep breath and realize you are not alone. There are hundreds of women like you wondering if their dreams are possible and worth it.  I am here to say YES it IS. I myself am a mother who is creating her business and I have been doing so for the past year. In my experience I have found while my child is in school there can be plenty of time to achieve my goals. It does takes time to create a habit of creating and attaining weekly goals but it is possible as long as you are consistent and want the change.

To start write your desires on paper, write every crazy idea down. Next make a list of the top 2 relevant steps to go forward which may mean finding mentors and online education programs that will help elevate your knowledge. Take action today by contacting at least 2 people today.  The sooner your journey begins the faster you will be on your way to setting up your dream online business.

For an online business you need to consider creating a youtube channel, blog, podcast, website and using periscope. Follow me @shanondawngoaldigger on twitter and periscope where I share business and romance tips for married women.

Realize that if you start taking consistent action today right after reading this post, in a year from now you will be in a totally different space of empowerment. 

Dear Procrastination:

I am taking time today to reframe my negative thoughts into self empowering ones by reading books and watching fun personal development videos. (for suggestions ask me in the comment section)

The reason I procrastinate and hesitate to accomplish my dreams and desires is because I feel a lack of trust, motivation, focus, not knowing exactly where to start and I'm a perfectionist.
Here's the deal no matter what my fear of the outcome is, when I really break it down on paper into little daily accomplishments, I notice that it is not as complex as I had thought. So I am making a promise to myself 'today' to take my desires seriously and to seek the appropriate mentoring from other women who are already where I want to be so that I can learn faster and become a momepreneur.

I once heard this; if Oprah procrastinated and said to her husband;
"well I don't know if I should be on TV" maybe I will sit and think about it.....now imagine she simply thought about it but decided to play her life smaller she would have missed out on using all of this amazing creativity!  She chose to start somewhere, learn, interview mentors and above all;  take consistent action.

Feel free to write in the comments what choices you have made today that will build your vision of tomorrow.  Good Luck !